Sefu Ulech



Potion: Cure Light: 40

Potion: Hide from Undead: 40

Minor Wondrous: Pipes of Haunting: 100

On Play: DC 13 will against frightened for 4 rounds

1/2 horse: 20 gold

remaining gold: 800


Sefu's Story (full)
As told by Sefu. All this is said in one VERY long sentence, with a smile on his masked face, except where noted in [square brackets]
One day, I was bored staying at home and since I am a storyteller I needed some stories to tell so I asked a transporter friend to teleport me to the surface so he did and then I was in the forest above the hive and that was cool because it wasn't the hive and so I went off walking and I walked for a while but less than a day and it was nice and warm and I saw a lot of bugs around me in the forest but the didn't talk to me and of course at that point I didn't know that they were called bugs yet because I hadn't met any humans but I did know that i would be talking any number of things including maybe giants although I knew that I would be afraid of giants and half giants and quarter giants and all the way down until they were normal sized people and maybe even then but anyway I knew I would be talking to a lot of people so I ad my friend make a mask for me so that I could always talk like the people I was talking to talked to each other and to me and that's how I figured out that I'm a bug because when I talked to the bugs in the forest it came out in my language that I speak without the mask even though people keep telling me I look like a really messed up elf or that my face is an elf's face at least when I wear the mask but I'm really a bug and so I was walking and talking to the bugs in the forest but they weren't answering me which was a little odd but "Oh well they're probably busy" I thought so I didn't mind too much and besides it was a pretty day and so I just walked around and eventually I saw a big platform on some hard rock stuff that tasted bad but was rock because humans were standing on it and humans stand around on rock a lot so it must have been rock and it didn't taste like metal which is what the large platform that was sticking out of the rock was made of and humans were standing in a line wearing packs like I was wearing and looking like they really wanted to walk up to the metal thing but they were hanging back and there were some half-people in the line too like half elves and half orcs and even a full elf or two and it was all very interesting and I knew that if any place up here would have stories to learn that there would be people where those stories were and that meant that people meant stories, so I got in line and started talking to people and the mask made it all come out in languages that were soft and smooth like a well bored out tunnel and others that were hard and harsh like a rock that gets stuck in your throat and others rattled like a falling avalanche and others were angry like my foreman when I zapped him because I was angry and it didn't even hurt him because he was a storyteller too and anyway all of these languages were fantastic except the angry one that i used when I talked to the half orc and people started looking at me and asking for my story using unfamiliar words and asking what I was and I said I'm a storyteller and they asked what I was and what my people were called and I said we were - [smile fades, and he stops for a second] Are? Were? I know I still am, but I'm talking about then, and I guess we were called that, even thogh we still are called that. So that works. [His smile returns, and his talking speed picks back up] - called Dromites and then they asked what a Dromite was and someone said talkative and I just beamed because that is a nice compliment from a stranger and people laughed so they liked it and someone said I looked like bug with an elf's face and that's where I learned the word bug and I was going to tell them about the bugs I had found in the forest but just then I heard a big WHOOSH noise and I looked up at the big metal platform and [breaks added to show the pauses and emphasis]
there was this big wooden thing there that looked like the pictures I had seen of "boats" except that boats were supposed to be in the water and this one was in the air and on FIRE.
It was so rad.
But scary too because fire hurts me just like it does other people and these people were about to get on the boat made of fire and so i said that it looked like it would hurt to get on a boat with that much fire and they laughed at me and told me that it was safe which was just stupid because fire can burn you or kill you if you aren't careful and it can hurt you even if someone else isn't careful but then I saw that people were also getting off of the flying fire-boat and that they were safe and happy and not burning and running around angry and unhappy like the fire makers in the hive did which was good because I don't like them much but these people looked like they were just as happy to have been of the air-fire-boat-thing as they were to be on the ground again so I walked with all the people and went up on the metal platform and then I was about to get on the boat but a human stopped me and asked for gold so I just blinked at him and he started trying in other languages that even the mask didn't help with and so I stopped him and told him that I understood the language but not the word gold and he said that it was a shiny metal that was like the color of the sun mixed with the color of a peach and he answered fast like he was asked all the time and I said oh my friends gave me some of that it's very tasty how much do you need and he blinked a lot and asked why I ate it when it was so valuable and then said nevermind so I didn't tell him it was because it was tasty and he asked for a few pieces and so I gave it to him and said enjoy and he did seem to because he smiled and then I got on the boat thing and walked to the edge and sure enough the fire didn't hurt me but it looked like it was a bit mad, but i think that's just the way fire is sometimes or maybe always so we left the platform thing that someone called the air dock and we were flying and it was so cool and then I saw the ocean which was bi and blue and pretty and we were heading right for it and it was like a lake and beautiful and [the words start coming slower now, and his smile starts to fade] big… and the land… was going … away.. and … my hive… and… [at this point Sefu talks about the speed a normal person on no caffien talks] so I asked the guy at the boat's big wheen if he could make the boat take me back home becuase my home was on the land and we were going aayt from the land. And he said no. So I just sat in the middle of the boat, and hummed to myself. [a few seconds of silence] And then [he speeds backl up, like a wind-up toy that has been rewound] someone shouted LAND HO and so I ran up and hugged the guy by the wheen and thanked him for taking me home again becuase it was so wonderful to be home and I'm afraid I scared him because he cried a little but only a little and then as the land came farther back in to view and we came to the air dock I realized that I didn't know this area very well but that was okay because really how far could I be from my hive and I knew all of the area around my hived and a lot of the area around that so we must just not be somewhere I knew but as we landed I realized that all of the trees were different that what I was used to [speech slows down to a little faster than normal human] and the grasses were different and the rocks were different and everything was different but that must [speeding up again] mean that wherever I am is somewhere new farther away from my hive and that when I got back I would have that many more stories to tell but since I was there I figured I might as well make the best of it so I got off of the boat and started walking around to see if I could find some people to walk around with because as smart as I am I'm apparently not very good with directions and beside that I also didn't know where I was so as I was walking through the town I was looking at everything and everyone and I came across an elf with a funny looking sword who was talking to some guards and getting pretty upset about something and I didn't like that it looked like the guards were gonna hurt him so I made all of them fall over by makeing grease appear, and laughed along with the small crowd that had gathered and they all liked me and I liked them and then I walked away because the guards looked like they would be angry at whoever it was that had just done that and so I found another group of people including a person who looked like a human but smelled like an animal and had things in her hair and she was nice to me and there was also a little person who was really unconventional about the shape they kept their body in because sometimes they were ale and sometimes they were femal and somewtimes they were neither and I'm used to that because that';s how dromites do it but we don't usually do all three in one day like this person did and we're usually a little more open about what our names are but anyway these two wound up finding the elf with the big sword and we all got together at a tavern and this guy gave uss a map and sent us off to get something really important and he had a contract for us to sign and everything but I don't remember it very clearly because when he signed it he used his blood which was weird i know and the even weirder part was that when it got close to me I REALLY wantted to eat the paper but then I didn't and my head was cloudy for a while after that but soon we started our journey and we walked a long way and then we slept, and we kept doing this, walking and sleeping, until we got to the edge of a forest and then I had a flash of realization that there was a planar rift of some kind nearby which was very cool but very scary too and so we all slept in the place where I discovered the rift because we didn't know which way we should go to stay on the plane we were on and apparently we were on the wrong plane because when we woke up the animal smelling person was gone and we were in a winter land with ice and snow that was very pretty but very cold and we wandered around and then we saw a thing in the sky above us and I was a bit afraid because it looked like a bird and I knew that birds eat bugs and I knew that I was a bug and so I was afraid that it was going to eat me but then it got closer and it turned out to not be a bird but instead to be a dragon and I made it laugh and it left us alone and we kept walking and then we camped and this wendigo person came and we gave him food and he ate it instead of us and we were happy and then we found out that he was in charge of this place and then we teleported somehow and it was all very confusing but that's okay and we finally found a way back and when we got back there was a big blast crater that I was standing in and the animal-smelling person said that we had all been acting crazy and she smelled like fear and then we got up and left becuase there was no more planar rift and it was safe and then we went to see some druids about more planar rifts and things and I don't remember what happene then but i think I got to knock someone opff of a ledge with grease at one point and it was exciting and then we went off and found a big cavern that was filled with people who didn't seem to mind us being there and that is where we found the stone tablets that the guy with the yummy smelling blood had hired us to get and the only issue was that the whole place wanted to kill us not even just the people but the cave too and then the animal-smelling person did something and the cave started trying to destroy itself and then a wall opened and we all went inside and I lost something of myself but I don't remember what but it can't have been too important anyway and we found the stones and then we went into a little pocket dimension and learned about the world which we were on and it was called ebberon and there was a dragon inside of it and the dragon wanted out but we didn't let it out and then I lost my psicrystal and I was sad but I couildn't remember how I had gotten it in the first place so I didn't get another one and then we got out of the pocket dimension and took the tablets and went back to the person with the yummy smelling blood but he said that we had taken too long and so he didn't give us all of our tasty gold and then we went to our room and he had followed us and then he turned into a dragon and we killed him and then…

and then I wound up here.

Sefu Ulech

Age of Mersuva Farfromunique